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Skip the Heralds

Not long after our engagement, my fiancée and I took a walk to Garden City, NY, on a Saturday afternoon. On Westminster Avenue just north of Hempstead Turnpike, we witnessed the grand entrance of a bride into the Catholic church that occupies the whole block. She came out of a sliver Excalibur and ascended the steps of the church, with each segment of her walk punctuated by trumpet fanfares from heralds who flanked the grand main entrance to the building. The heralds, of course, wore attire evoking storybook medieval court valets. Standing there, observing the spectacle, my fiancée and I decided then and there that we wanted to experience the same pomp on our Special Day.

We came to our senses eventually. Rain precluded any outdoor portion of our wedding, and we ended up driving our own car on the way out of the catering hall. Sometimes we wistfully recall the scene we witnessed and wonder why we didn’t pursue that vision more assiduously, but the truth is, it was no big loss.  Seriously: what difference would it have made in the long run? Would it improve our relationship, or just remain an interesting anecdote to tell the kids?

Perhaps our attitude does not reflect mainstream thinking, but our efforts went into making the guests feel comfortable,  finding the right people to honor and stuffing as many gifts as possible into our 1993 Mercury Sable. Everything else, including the chocolate-frosted wedding cake (no, it wasn’t white; so what?), remained in the realm of details - important enough to warrant consideration at some point, but not worth worrying about very much.

So let’s keep perspective as we plan our happy events.

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